Music Monday #18: Thy Will

I heard this song, a week or two ago. And it just made me think. I sat at the top of the hill, early in the morning. Watching the sunrise. And just listened. There was something about this song, that just called to me. The music. The lyrics. Hillary's voice.

The last few years, have been something else. At times, just unbearable. And at other times, I've felt so raw. So exposed. This song, just reminds me...of how vulnerable we can be. And how we can carry all of this with us.

But through it all, no matter what...we MUST trust in God. He will carry us, through it all. The pain, the hurt, the loneliness. I know, the tough days, are not all behind me. But there are some truly AMAZING days, in front of me. And I need to remember, to trust in God.


As hard as life can be, we can't lose our faith. Our paths, are difficult at times. And at times, I HATE so much about life. But life, is truly a miracle. Because of our Lord. And his love for us.

I pray every single day. For my family. And my friends. For myself. Lately, it's been a lot for myself. And my struggles. I get on my knees, and pray. That I can hear, see, and feel God's plans for me. That he has a plan for me. Maybe it will include a husband, children, and love. Maybe it includes more pain and hurt.

Whatever it is, he will walk along side me. And when it becomes too much to bare, he will carry me. I know this, first hand. Because I know, it was God that has gotten me through the last 6 years. On the toughest days, I turned to God. And asked for his help, his love, and his compassion. For myself. My Dad. My family. My friends. And my enemies.

I am so amazed by God and his love for me. We are so very blessed. Even on the worst of days, we have the most amazing love...that we could ever ask for! God will guide us. And help us, through the darkest of days. I know this. And this song, is just a reminder, of all the love...that God has for us. ❤

Music Monday #6: Humble and Kind

Do you ever hear a song, and it just stops you? Dead in your tracks. Gives you chills. You think, they were reading my mind. Hey, this song feels so familiar. Yet, you know, you've never heard it before.

I felt that way, just this past week. I heard "Humble and Kind." For the first time. On my way to see a patient. I literally had to pull over, onto the side of the road. It hit me that hard! And I just sat there, and listened. Silently, the tears fell. And I had goosebumps, everywhere!

This song, reminded me, of all those lessons I was taught as a child. The values that my family, was instilling, in me. The words reminded me, of my Daddy. Of a chapter of struggle. These simple words, reminded me of the struggles, that I'm currently carrying. It reminded me, that no matter what I'm facing, there is always a humbling moment.


"Don't hold a grudge or a chip, and here's why. Bitterness keeps you from flyin'." Words I need to remember. I need to write them down, and keep them close. Hard times, many times, makes people hard. And I don't want to be, that kind of person. I don't want to be bitter in life. I want to soar. I want to make the world, a better place.

Just sit and listen to these words. Or read over the lyrics. It really is a beautiful song. I enjoy country music, for this reason. There is such meaning, behind the music. And Tim McGraw, is just one of those artists, that gives even more to his music. His music, has inspired me, so many times.

"Be humble and kind." Words spoken, from my Daddy, many times. More than I could count. It was his way of life. Never forgetting where he came from. Or the people that helped him get there. Never holding a grudge. Or harming others. Always knowing, there was good to be done, in this world. ❤

Music Monday #3: I'll Be

It's pretty funny when you think about it. At different points of your life, you have different friends. Different people you lean on. Friends that you call besties, sometimes just disappear from your life.

I can sit and tell you about a variety of besties, that have come and gone. Mostly, we just lost touch. I have a childhood friend, that was definitely a bestie of mine. Then she moved. We chat from time to time. Have gotten closer because of Facebook. But it's not the same.

A high school bestie and I, well we just lost track of each other. I tried a few times to keep in contact, but our lives just went  in such different directions. Same can be said for a friend who I went to college with. We started off close, then I'm not sure...

Oh college. There were a few. There was a girl, that we just clicked. We were friends. And spent a ton of time together. Going to lunch, hanging out in classes. Then I'm not sure. Life just took over. I was busy in school. She was busy with family. I had another friend, we were super close. The kind of friends that stayed up, until 2AM talking. Just because. We had so much in common. And spent most of our days, laughing. And playing music. Then a misunderstanding, sent us in opposite directions. Really, to never talk again.

I can confidently say, most of the friends I made in medical school, and working have been a different breed of friends. Those friends. The kind that you lean on. That are there, no matter what. I'm proud to say that. We stick together. Fight for each other.

I'm also very lucky, to say I have a friend from college, that we've stayed super close. At times, we don't talk for a bit. But we always manage to send each other a text message. Or e-mail. That is comforting. Super comforting really!

But the kind of friend I'm talking about today, is a lifelong kind of friend. He's the guy that met me, when I was hours old. We grew up together. He was ALWAYS my protector. And one day, we fell in love. Things in the love department, didn't work out well. We would break up during his senior year in high school. We'd try it again, my freshman year in college. Heck, we'd try it a third time. Thinking, this could be it.

It's just not in the cards. I can say that confidently. It's not in the cards. Maybe in 10 years. Maybe after both of us, leave our hometown. Maybe in different circumstances. Just not right now. And honestly, that's OK. For both of us.



But every single time, I hear this song, I think of him. My lifelong bestie. The man, that I can ALWAYS count on! No matter what. A heartbreak, a struggle with school, being lost in the world, battling the Big C, or my Dad's passing. He has been my rock!

It's funny how life works. Who would have thought, all those years ago, he'd be the solid rock by my side. Who would have thought, the little boy that came to visit the new baby girl, would really take to heart the vow of protection, love, and friendship.

It really is pretty incredible. That the two of us have last the test of time. And life really. And not just lasted. But really grown. And flourished. Honestly, making each other stronger. My bestie, he'll ALWAYS be at my side. I know this. Deep down in my soul. And I Thank God, every single day, for him! ❤